School at the kitchen table

This should have been posted back in August.

Tuesday marked the first day of school for Redmond students.  Hayden’s best friend (actually they call each other sister and brother) started kindergarten this year and I was worried that since she was going to school Hayden would want to go to “regular” school with her, so I fearfully asked him one afternoon.  He said he wanted to do home school.   Great!  Then I took it a step further and drove him to the school his friend would attend in the fall and asked him again, “do you want to go to this school with Francine, or do you want to home school?”  Again the answer was home school.  I had dodged the bullet again.  Well, when school started this week I thought it would be fun to see Francine off on the school bus on her first day but we overslept. We tried again on the second day.  We crawled out of bed at 7:45, slipped on some cozy clothes and dragged out feet to the bus stop.  On our way there Hayden said to me “I don’t want to go to school because it’s too early.”  YES, I thought to myself.  

I mention this only to highlight one of the main reasons I chose to home school; flexibility (and sleeping in).

Flexibility allows us to navigate our day our way.  We aren’t rushed in the morning to eat breakfast, get dressed, and race to get to school.  Yes, some mornings when I schedule an early doctor’s appointment we are forced to hustle, but we aren’t doing it five mornings a week. 

Another example is that if Hayden were in regular school, we wouldn’t be able to take a two month cross country road trip.  Instead we are going to home school along the way. 

And I just want to point out that while I’ve been writing this post, Hayden has sat across the kitchen table from me doing his math.  Oh, he’s done.  It’s time for spelling.

Day 2/3

Yesterday morning went better than I had expected.  I woke up and cuddled with Tristan for about 30 minutes before he “told” me to get up and come play with him.  When I protested he said “I’ll even play Barbies,”  which was a reference to my love of Barbie play when I was a kid.  Olivier was out for a walk and Hayden was playing with his R2-D2 character when Tristan and came into the living room/play room.  We ate breakfast together while I read the WSJ online and then Hayden actually did some school work (math, history and reading).  If TV had been an option, he never would have agreed to doing school work.  Another quiet morning.

I managed to make it through the day without the urge to turn on the TV (maybe because there is NOTHING on network TV on the weekend).  We were out running errands when Jacques Pepin’s cooking show was on so I missed that. Once the kids were in bed Olivier and I watched the last episode of The Tudors for season 3, but I failed to turn off the TV once it was over.  I  was too tired to read, so I watched the last 30 minutes of Law & Order and then went to bed. 

This morning was my version of heaven (or at least one version I have of heaven).  I woke up at 8am (Hayden and Tristan slept in until 8 as well!) and I had them come cuddle in my bed for a few minutes before I turned on cartoons for them.  Then I snuck out to the living room, turned on Fox News Sunday w/ Chris Wallace, started the coffee and exhaled.  I was alone with my news show and since I’d withheld TV from the kids for a few days I was uninterrupted by guilt. 

For some reason This Week was not on at 9am so I opted to talk with my mom on the phone for a bit and get dressed for the day.  With the kids still watching cartoons (PBS of course) I settled in at 10am to watch Meet the Press to complete my Sunday morning programming.  Following that we turned off the TV, made lunch and headed out to go grocery shopping. 

So, I’ll admit that going the weekend without a lot of TV is normally fairly easy; Olivier is home so we get to go out and do family things, and there isn’t much on anyway.  This week might be more challenging but maybe I’ll finish my library book!

Day 1

So I started my week-of-no-TV today and day 1 went pretty well.  Instead of watching the Today Show in my room with a bowl of cereal, I sat at the table with my laptop and read the Wall Street Journal while Tristan sat next to me.  Hayden played a math game on his Didj and we all had a nice quiet morning.  It was a nice change of pace. 

This afternoon we spent time with friends outside, so TV wasn’t even on my radar until it was time to come inside at 4pm.  I had about 30 minutes to kill before I took Hayden to chess class and what I really wanted to do was veg out in front of Oprah and eat some of the chocolate chip cookies that Tristan and I baked yesterday.  Instead however, Tristan and I sat down on the floor and put three puzzles together (and I ate blueberries). 

Now that the kids are in bed (not sure if they’re asleep yet) I am going to add one more rule for the week and that is to allow myself to watch The Tudors with Olivier (we rented it from Blockbuster and it has to be returned by Monday- so if I don’t watch it, it’s money wasted and we don’t want that now do we?).

Tomorrow is Saturday.  (long pause here).  Not sure how I’m going to handle the hysteria that will take place when I tell the kids no cartoons in the morning.  Maybe I will bribe them with an outing for chocolate croissants.

Giving Up TV for a Week

Last year a dear friend of mine challenged herself and her family to eat locally for one month.  Well, she inspired me.  Not necessarily to eat locally (Olivier watched Food,Inc. and ever since he’s jumped on my bandwagon of shopping at Whole Foods, eating locally when possible, and such), but to give up a very bad habit I have (and fear I’m passing on to my children).  Watching TV. 

I thought that when we canceled our cable I would watch less TV but that hasn’t proven to be the case.  Instead I just watch less “substantive'” shows.  Well, maybe that’s not all true.  Without cable I can’t watch the Real Housewives series (and I watched them all) which would have boosted my IQ except that I replaced it with Gossip Girls (yes, I admit it okay!). 

I don’t have an obsession with TV, it’s just easy; because that’s what I’m used to, and I worry that my children are falling into the same pattern.  So I’ve decided that we are going to give up TV for one week (baby steps) and see where it leads us.  Olivier doesn’t watch  Here are the following rules:

1. Sunday morning political talk shows are allowed and kids can watch a movie or cartoons while I’m watching those shows.

2. The new season of Lost is about to start and I will exempt that show from my no TV rule. 

3. If I need to nap in the afternoon I will allow the kids to watch a movie during that time.  It keeps them quiet and calm, hence, facilitating my much needed nap. 

4. Jacques Pepin has a new cooking show on PBS Saturday afternoons and I would like to exempt that as well. 

Otherwise, no TV.  No morning news shows, that don’t really report meaningful news anyway; no Gossip Girls, no QVC, no The View (which always makes me mad that I wasted my time watching it in the first place), no The Good Wife or 30Rock, or  re-runs of Deadliest Catch or Friends or Frasier. (I’ve seen them once, I don’t need to see them again).  You get the picture.

Even though I’m excited to see what other joys in my day appear that wouldn’t have had I kept the TV on, it’s also a little scary because I don’t want to fail at this challenge.  Wish me luck and I’ll keep you posted.  

Brave Kids

This is at a rest stop in South Dakota. Notice the rattle snake next to them in the flower bed! They are brave kids.

Two Thoughts for the Day

I tuned into AM 570 this afternoon like I normally do expecting to listen to the vernacular Merlot that is Dennis Miller, and to my unhappy surprise they have moved his show to the 3am time slot and replaced him with a local guy! It's not bad enough that they took Dr. Larua off completely, but now I'm expected to get up at 3am to listen to Dennis! What is this world coming to?

Another thought I had today was that I need to TURN OFF THE TV. I keep telling my kids they need to do something else besides watch tv, but then I find myself turning on the cartoons for them so that I can watch tv for myself. Do I really need to watch The Today Show, Rachel Ray, or The View? NO. I'm thinking about taking a week off of tv (with the excpetion of my Sunday morning news shows: Fox News w/Chris Wallace, This Week (I miss you George) and Meet the Press. No more cheesy weekday morning "news" shows, no more daytime talk shows, no more court tv, no more American Idol (which I only watch b/c Olivier loves it), no more Fraiser reruns at 11pm and....wait, when does the new season of Lost come on- I will have to include that in my exception list.

I'll keep you posted as to when I start and how it works out.

A Book Series All Parents Must Read

My son Tristan is going through his "disequilibrium" phase of his third year. People say that the terrible twos are bad but that's because they haven't been through the terrible threes yet. A book I have found that has helped me deal with and understand this age (and probably saved Tristan from emotional scaring several times) is "Your Three-Year-Old: Friend or Enemy" written by Dr. Louise Bates Ames.

She has written a series of books describing childhood development from year one through year fourteen. She describes common characteristics associated with a particular age, the theory of a child being within "equilibrium" and "disequilibrium," and techniques on how to cope/handle your child's behavior at each age. It is eye opening and heart softening. I implore all of you to read it and start enjoying your children at every stage (as hard as it is sometimes). This book series has certainly helped me embrace Tristan's (and Hayden's) difficult moments and to know that "this too shall pass."

A Worthy Note:

These books are not expensive and I recommend that you just purchase them rather than borrow them from the library or a friend because you will end up referring to them a lot. I one asked a friend if I could borrow hers and was put off when she said no, but once I bought my own I completely understood. I have read them over and over and will probably have to re-read them again once baby #3 comes along.